Diva of ruminations

I THINK I THINK TOO MUCH

Well another coffee muse going on this morning, seems to be my best time for reflection these days. I have to think about how much sleep I’ve had lately and it certainly isn’t much. I’m kind of inspired by all of your interest in my Amber Trilogy, my adventure story in Mexico and Guatemala. My email box is full this morning from so many of you asking when I will do another chapter. I have my diaries out from that time in my life and there were things I had forgotten. I am wondering where to pick up and continue. It will come to me eventually, like the painting sitting to my side that I keep going back to and adding more, eventually the complete story will unfold. I am learning patience, there is time for everything.

I decided that I think too much, then I wonder does everyone have a mind that just keeps spitting out thoughts and ideas? I wonder, it’s been a problem now for awhile. I think about what I should do this morning, refuse to do a list. Years of living with a civil engineer and having everything precisely done and conformed to have all been thrown out the door. I’m in a totally wing it stage, with ideas, thoughts tumbling like a full blown Tsunami in my mind. I would be the diva of ruminations these days.

Oddly enough this thinking brought me to an article that atheists tend to think more deeply as opposed to religious people who have a greater tendency to judge by intuition. I find this statement rather ludicrous. My thinking too much has definitely allowed me to dig into my inner self  these past few years, I’m definitely very intuitive and have always been very aware of  my supernatural abilities. I try and set that part of my life to the side but can’t always ignore it, when it flares as I call it, you have to deal with it because it won’t go away. It’s not like a headache,  if you take an aspirin it’s going to subside.

When I start thinking too much anything can happen. I tend to react emotionally to my thoughts and many times there are consequences. I still say it’s the red hair, my own doctor even told me I’m wired differently. And then I started thinking about that. I won’t ramble on this morning but I understand that many blind spots can appear when you’re an emotional thinker and I think I need to work on that.

When you’ve lived with a methodical thinker for so many years and all at once that influence is no longer there, you become an almost untapped resource of thinking too much. At least that’s how I’ve rationalized it from an emotional perspective and I’ve justified it.  I’ve also been accused of taking an interest in things that most people would not be bothered with. Is that because I’m thinking too much again, or is it because I really do see something beautiful and worthwhile to notice? It opens up all your doors of probability.

So getting back to the spiritual side of thinking too much, that has opened up a wonderful realm of possibilities for  me and I’ve embraced it. It has my whole world jazzed, tingling and I’m loving it.  So I think I shall continue on, thinking too much, shooting from the heart, trusting my intuitions and seeing things differently from most people.

Because you see, I don’t think people think “enough”….

copyright Es-tee Miller

“Some people care too much, I think it’s called love”… A.A. Milne